My Daughter's Birthmother

I have been thinking of her so much today. If she knows about our court date on Wed. and plans to attend, I'm sure she's weighted by it. I know I am.

I am starting to feel the enormity of what she will be doing... making the long trip to Addis, staying overnight in a strange place, appearing in court, relinquishing custody (God willing), seeing pictures of her daughter, and reading the letter we sent.

Today as I was getting dressed and ready to begin my day, it just hit me. And I wept. T's birthmother and I are forever connected, though we will most likely never meet. But in that moment when it felt like my heart was breaking in half, I shared her pain.

Court-- passing court, I should say-- is a beginning for us. The beginning of T legally and wholly being our daughter in the eyes of the Ethiopian government. For her birthmother, it is an ending. The ending of T being her daughter in the eyes of the Ethiopian government. A birth certificate will be issued, with my name as "Mother" and A's as "Father." It will be as though T was never her birthmother's, just always our daughter.

She says good bye forever to her daughter and I say hello forever to my daughter. Our beautiful, sweet, tiny girl...

Tonight my heart is heavy. I am praying that she makes the journey and that we pass court on Wednesday. I am praying for her-- for strength, for hope for her daughter, for comfort of her broken heart. For her to know that her daughter is loved and will be loved forever. I'm praying that she knows her daughter will be ok and that we will do whatever we can to give her a good life.