I went to visit my friend P for a few days this week. We haven't seen each other in 2 years, and that visit was very short. She lives about 5.5 hours away from me, and we used to work together. She had to move (well, twice since leaving here) because of her husband's job.
It is so nice to just be able to slide back into a grove with her. I used to talk to her on the phone almost daily and visited her multiple times throughout a year. This was before the kids, and obviously I don't always have the time or money to travel all the time. I feel guilty about sort of letting that friendship fall apart, but I just couldn't help it.
We used to shop a lot when she lived her, and we had a fun shopping day on Wed. Her daughter came along with us, and that was fun, too. Her daughter is going to be a high schooler soon, and I can't believe she's old enough to be in HS now.
The bottom line is that I have missed P so much recently, and it was wonderful to have a few days break from my current reality. The girls stayed with my parents because of A's work schedule. They got to fish, play, and go to the zoo. I love my girls, but I did need a break. Does that seem selfish? Sometimes I feel like I can't breathe. I just needed some time off from them.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Friday, July 13, 2012
Adjusting
One of the first things the director of our agency's transitional home told us about R is that, even at 3 months old, she liked routine. Oh, how true this simple statement has become! My R is someone who thrives on structure and routine.
With that said, our summer has been anything but routine. A was off for a week before starting a new job, and then when he did start, he was on a basic 8 to 5 shift.
Last week, he started his "normal" shift of 11:30 to 8:30pm. This has been hard on both girls. E usually stays up until he gets home, and she whimpers about missing daddy for 30 to 45 minutes before he does come home. R has had a horrible time adjusting to his being gone at night. Dinnertime and bedtime are really hard for me. Yes, A is home in the mornings, but mornings have always been "easier" than evenings for my girls.
In short, I do NOT want to complain about my husband's job. In the long run, this job is going to be a good thing for our family, and I am so thankful that he is employed. However, this adjustment to the new routine of our life is difficult on all of us right now.
I know that eventually, this new life will become routine. It is just hard to parent my kids solo, and my sweet girls miss their daddy. I am fearful of when I return to work because it will be hard to balance school responsibilities with parenting the girls alone. And the girls will only see their daddy in the morning when he takes them to school/my friend M's house for the day.
With that said, our summer has been anything but routine. A was off for a week before starting a new job, and then when he did start, he was on a basic 8 to 5 shift.
Last week, he started his "normal" shift of 11:30 to 8:30pm. This has been hard on both girls. E usually stays up until he gets home, and she whimpers about missing daddy for 30 to 45 minutes before he does come home. R has had a horrible time adjusting to his being gone at night. Dinnertime and bedtime are really hard for me. Yes, A is home in the mornings, but mornings have always been "easier" than evenings for my girls.
In short, I do NOT want to complain about my husband's job. In the long run, this job is going to be a good thing for our family, and I am so thankful that he is employed. However, this adjustment to the new routine of our life is difficult on all of us right now.
I know that eventually, this new life will become routine. It is just hard to parent my kids solo, and my sweet girls miss their daddy. I am fearful of when I return to work because it will be hard to balance school responsibilities with parenting the girls alone. And the girls will only see their daddy in the morning when he takes them to school/my friend M's house for the day.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Brothers
I have two of them, and A has one (as well as a sister)... One of my brothers lives about 20 minutes from my house and has always been involved in the girls' lives because he's close by. My other brother, J, lived out of state for a long time but has recently moved back to the area. I'm LOVING that my girls are getting to spend time with their Uncle J and are really starting to form a bond with him. Recently, when we were all up at my parents' house, he fished with them in my parents' pond and read them book after book. He stopped short of playing "My Little Ponies" with them, but I can't blame him there. (R has very specific scenarios for playing ponies, lol.) In short, he's a really good uncle to my girls, and they love him. I'm thankful for his time back home because he's no longer a stranger to them.
We also saw A's brother, T, last night. I was noticing how good he is with my niece, who has some special needs. Although he doesn't spend much time with my girls, it was really nice to watch him with my niece, his son, and my girls... I can see that he loves my niece and is almost like a parent figure in her life, which she needs.
All in all, although I ALWAYS wanted a sister when I was growing up, I am very thankful for my two brothers and A's brother... Good, strong, positive male influences in my daughter's lives.
We also saw A's brother, T, last night. I was noticing how good he is with my niece, who has some special needs. Although he doesn't spend much time with my girls, it was really nice to watch him with my niece, his son, and my girls... I can see that he loves my niece and is almost like a parent figure in her life, which she needs.
All in all, although I ALWAYS wanted a sister when I was growing up, I am very thankful for my two brothers and A's brother... Good, strong, positive male influences in my daughter's lives.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Grad School: The End... and Other Things
Ahh, I am finished with grad school as of Friday night. I couldn't be happier that this 18+ month journey is finally over for me. I just can't believe I actually survived the whole thing.
Looking back, I know it will help me in the next step in my career-- whenever and whatever that may be. I have to have additional licensure to do anything else besides be in the classroom. Which I am fine with doing for now. I had applied in the spring for another position in my district and didn't get it. However, A's new job requires him to work until 8:30pm during the week, and that job would have required lots of after school meetings and day trips to the state capitol for meetings. This would have been hard with A no longer to be home in the evenings or to pick up the kids for me occasionally.
I feel like I'm free... I seriously thought after we put the girls to bed tonight, "ok, what do I need to do for my class tonight?" and then had the wonderful realization that the answer is NOTHING.
I do still have to take the state license test, but I'm not too concerned about it.
Another teacher in my department recently resigned, which means I'll be picking up an additional prep this year-- an advanced class. This should be a challenge, but in a good way, for me. It will be interesting to work with students who are gifted in some way in reading, writing, or both. It will also be a challenge to teach HS material to 8th grade students... Just because they are advanced doesn't mean they are not still middle schoolers!
I don't know what I'll be doing with this blog... or if anyone even reads it anymore. It was simply not something I could maintain while working through grad school. In truth, I enjoy writing but I also don't know if I need a public forum for it at this point. It made sense when we were in the middle of our adoption to record the journey and to share it with others. I don't know if sharing our daily life make sense anymore or not.
Looking back, I know it will help me in the next step in my career-- whenever and whatever that may be. I have to have additional licensure to do anything else besides be in the classroom. Which I am fine with doing for now. I had applied in the spring for another position in my district and didn't get it. However, A's new job requires him to work until 8:30pm during the week, and that job would have required lots of after school meetings and day trips to the state capitol for meetings. This would have been hard with A no longer to be home in the evenings or to pick up the kids for me occasionally.
I feel like I'm free... I seriously thought after we put the girls to bed tonight, "ok, what do I need to do for my class tonight?" and then had the wonderful realization that the answer is NOTHING.
I do still have to take the state license test, but I'm not too concerned about it.
Another teacher in my department recently resigned, which means I'll be picking up an additional prep this year-- an advanced class. This should be a challenge, but in a good way, for me. It will be interesting to work with students who are gifted in some way in reading, writing, or both. It will also be a challenge to teach HS material to 8th grade students... Just because they are advanced doesn't mean they are not still middle schoolers!
I don't know what I'll be doing with this blog... or if anyone even reads it anymore. It was simply not something I could maintain while working through grad school. In truth, I enjoy writing but I also don't know if I need a public forum for it at this point. It made sense when we were in the middle of our adoption to record the journey and to share it with others. I don't know if sharing our daily life make sense anymore or not.
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