Sweetest Thing That Happened Today

Lazy Sunday morning at our house. Both girls come in bed with us before we really want to get up, and they crawl around and play...

E stops playing for a moment, leans over my face, and kisses me twice, drool and all, right on the lips.

She is so precious.

Satin Pillowcases on Etsy.com

Ok, I know, more talk about satin pillowcases, right?

But I wanted to share with you who made the pillowcases for my girls as well as a picture just so you could see. I know the picture is not the best quality, but I took it from the convo feature of etsy in which she sent it to me. But it is the 3 pillowcases for R, with an "R" on each in opposite colors. You can't really see it very well, but she's also put a rhinestone right next to the "R." (She's not putting them on the ones for the baby, of course!)

I got them from the seller "HILARYD4790," and she is going above and beyond on these for my girls to make them great. She's selling them for $4 a piece, which I think is a great price, too. She did 2 pink, 2 purple, 1 green, and 1 orange for the girls' rooms and to leave at my parents' house for when the girls spend the night.

If you're interested in getting some from her, go to the etsy site, and do a search for her username under "sellers." There is a place where it says "contact seller" and that will be where you talk to her about making some for you.

Oh, I want to point out that I'm not getting anything for posting this info on my blog. I just know there have to be other people out there who want pillowcases, and this particular seller has been great to me... So I thought I'd pass her info on to you. (She did NOT ask me to do this or anything like that, but she does know I'm posting this!)

Ugh.

Said to me today about the girls: "They're cute. How much did they cost?!?"

My (icy) reply: "Nothing."

Why are people so rude? Do YOU have kids, buddy? How much did THEY cost? Why do people think it is ok to ask adoptive parents questions like that?

If you're an adoptive parent, how do you answer questions like that? Also, what do you do when people want to touch your children's hair? I need to be more assertive about that, too, while I'm at it.

Satin Pillowcases

I read somewhere-- a blog, an online article, a book, a magazine... I don't know which-- before R came home about the importance of using satin for African hair. A and I stored the info away and didn't act on it until it was clear that we were at a point with R's hair that we had to make some changes... It was time to really start understanding that beautiful Ethiopian baby curls need something different than what my hair does, for example.

I remembered about the satin pillowcase suggestion and tried it out. R's hair was improved immediately. Why? Well, satin is smooth, for the most part. Instead of my girls' hair getting sort of "stuck" on cotton and especially flannel, when they move their heads, their hair just glides across the pillowcase. Bottom line, hair that isn't catching on material for 8 hours straight is healthier and stronger hair. It also helps to keep the hair's moisture better for many of the same reasons.

So, I don't just have my girls sleep on satin because they're princesses.... it is because it really is better for their precious curls. I am sure you will find the same if you start using satin for your ET children, too!

Misc. and a few questions answered

(Not that I'm biased in any way whatsoever, but aren't my girls the cutest children you've ever seen? This picture was taken a few days after we came home with E. She and big sister R in her crib. Her room is purple and orange, which I think I mentioned before. My mother in law did the curtains, valance, bed skirt, quilt, blanket, crib bumper, and sheets for the room!)

First, baby girl had blood work done today. We got the orders on Jan. 8 and waited until we had an insurance card in hand with her name on it before we went to do it. She did really well, the sweet little beet. We have to return on Friday to get more drawn because they couldn't draw enough for all the tests today because of her weight.

Question I got today about R while we were there: "Is she adopted, too, or is she yours?" I just said that they are both my girls. I know the nurse didn't mean it like it sounded, but sometimes it is really hard to answer questions like that gracefully.

A few posts ago, I got a few questions about the little doll thingy E is sleeping with. It is from etsy.com, and the seller is "yournest." I love etsy!! My favorite thing is the alchemy feature in which you can put out a request for something you want. For example, I recently did one for satin pillowcases for the girls. (Side note, if you have ET children and don't use satin pillowcases yet-- GO BUY ONE. Right now. We started having R sleep on one-- a king sized one will fit across a crib mattress pretty well-- when she was about 9 months old, and it is amazing how much a difference it makes! We brought one to ET, and E slept on it every time she was napping or down for the night-- except for the pic in the post below because that was her first nap with us, and I did not think of it until that first evening with her. Anyway, I digress.) I was tired of only being able to find white and off white satin pillowcases so I did a request on etsy and am getting great custom ones with the the girls' initials on them... and for a great price! Etsy is addicting; I'll warn you now!

Another question I got was if our agency's transitional home had moved before we went to ET. We were actually the last travel group to stay at The Union and to meet our children at the old HH. Many of the children were already at the new HH on our "gotcha" day, and everyone moved on the Wed. we were there.

I loved meeting my E where we met R. I loved going back... However, traveling the same week they were moving meant that A didn't want families hanging around HH too much so we did not get to spend as much time there as we had hoped. That was disappointing for both A and me.

We did get to go the the new HH on the last day of our trip, and it amazing!! I cannot say enough good things about the new place.

Ok, I hope I answered all the questions you asked. If not, feel free to post the question again, and I'll get back to you.

More about our trip and how we're doing... coming soon!

Ethiopia Trip: Day 4: Evening

Monday, December 28, 2009, 8:10pm

(See below for an earlier in the day entry about the embassy appointment! 2 posts in one day again although it says Jan. 21 because that is when I started it!)

T is asleep. Starting to learn some of her cries. I know now her "I'm hungry!!" and "I'm tired!!" cries. She is just soooo sweet and precious. Tonight she freaked out a little bit and really wanted A to put her to sleep right around 7pm. She was out in about 3 minutes and has mostly been sleeping peacefully. I am hoping tonight goes as well as last night did.

Tomorrow is our shopping day. A and I just went through our list of what to buy and got that all organized. T will go to HH for the day as A and I both want to do the shopping. I'm sure when we pick her up after it, it will be a little difficult, but she'll be ok. And it will be the last time the special mothers will see her so I think it will be good for them to be able to say good bye.

HH is completely moving on Wed., so this will be our last chance to say good bye to our daughters' ET home. Weird to think about, really, but I know the move is necessary. I am hoping to spend a little more time when B tomorrow, too, so I am about to report back to S. And, mostly, just to be with her, the sweet little baby, would be lovely, although she was very shy when we met her the first time Sunday. (Was that really only yesterday?)

I'm so tired tonight. Getting up at 6am to be ready for the emb. appt. was rough. A and I both napped while T did this afternoon, but now I am thinking it is time for bed again.

Ethiopia Trip: Day 4: Embassy Appointment Day

Monday, December 28, 2009, 2:15pm

The princess is currently napping. She did very well last night-- only getting up 2 times, once around midnight, the other around 5am. (Maybe waking up for the call to prayer? And A said he heard roosters this morning, too!) She had hardly had any formula with us because she kept spitting it back up. Turns out the "age appropriate" guideline for bottle nipples is not a good one. We brought size 4; she's on 2! We asked A today, and she gave us T's actual nipples from HH. She started to perk up right away and is now eating fine. She can also eat table food, which is good because that's all she really had until we figured out the problem.

Across the street, construction is still going on on the building that was being built in Feb. 2008 when we were here last. Currently, men and women are carrying large rocks, one by one, into the construction site. For what reason? Who knows? I could watch the street below our hotel all day long and never get bored!

Above: A rather poor (but actually the only one I can find at the moment) photo of the building in Feb. 2008. Below: The same building in Dec. 2009! These are the rocks I'm talking about.

T is warming up to me much more today. Last night, she was all daddy's girl, but she is doing better with me. I'm not too concerned as this is pretty normal behavior. After all, the knowledge that she has of women is that they leave her. It will take a while for her to understand I'm not going anywhere!

The embassy appointment was fine. We rode to it in a small bus, and A held T while she looked out the window.

We waited for quite a while for all the appts.-- nearly 3 hours. T was an absolute angel baby and slept on me most of the time. The questions were basic-- is this the child referred to you? When did you meet her? What do you know about the birth family? Will you meet the birthmother? If you ever would, you understand that you cannot give her anything? You understand that the adoption is final and forever? (A thousand times, yes!)

T woke up at the end of our time there and did cry a little but was mostly fine. Really, all the babies were!

She is a snuggle bug, this one. So much more so than R already. She loves to just be held and cuddled, especially when sleepy. She sort of attaches herself to us, a good thing, indeed, and loves to grab onto our shirts while falling asleep and having a bottle. Or whenever, really. She just loves to feel secure. Sweet little beet indeed!

Addis. Once again the city overwhelms me. Constantly moving and busy. But poverty and sadness all around, too. It is hard to really imagine that my babies are from here (even with being here right now) and what their lives would be like had they stayed.

There is no Internet at the hotel this time, but text messaging on my cell phone works. I sent an update that way, as I'm sure back home, people are wondering. I know it went through because at 2:30pm-- 5:30am at home-- L texted me back, and I was able to send and receive another response. So that is good. (By the way, she's having a BOY!!)

Ethiopia Trip: Day 3: The First Evening

Sunday, December 27, 2009, 8:15pm

We have her! Our daughter is now sleeping peacefully in the Moses basket at the foot of our bed.

I cannot say that our first meeting with our daughter was blissful. She was so scared, my precious girl! She cried and cried when I first held her and reached for her special mothers and for A (HH director). (I'm sure it didn't help that they woke her up from her nap.) She was terrified, and of course, I don't blame her. She finally did fall asleep on me while we were at HH, but I think it was because she wore herself out.

As we walked the short distance to HH, I couldn't help but remember the last time we did this to bring home R. I miss her so much! I was so nervous, too.

A wanted us to meet our kids one family at a time this time... and the babies were all napping so one by one, families went into the house. About halfway through the families, A called our "J family, T's parents," and into the house we went.

We met our daughter on the steps in the main house at HH. We were on our way upstairs, and the special mother met us there with a confused and crying infant. She said, "T? T's parents?" I must confess I didn't realize it was her at first! I wasn't expecting to meet my daughter in the middle of a flight of stairs.

Her cry could break your heart right in half. She cries with her whole face, her whole body, the poor baby. It took A's holding her and speaking to her in Amharic to calm her down enough to fall asleep in my arms.

After meeting T, we were able to meet S's daughter B and take some pictures. She is so darling and precious but was very scared of us. I hope to be able to spend some more time with her and take more pictures with her as the week progresses.

T's really taken to her Daddy, not so much to me. She sat on his lap all through dinner and even shared some hamburger bun with him. She hasn't had much of a bottle, but that's ok.

After dinner, I took T upstairs while A signed for the bill. She realized he wasn't with us and just cried and cried until he finally came upstairs. She fell asleep in less than two minutes, I think! A held her a little while and put her down. She wiggled and got comfortable and then stayed asleep.

One of the most precious surprises of the day is a CD. Not just any CD, though. It is a CD labeled "T with her [birth] mom." A and I both teared up when we were told what it was. A precious treasure. Even though we will not meet T's birthmom, we have pictures of her. That is an amazing gift. I cannot wait to see them.

I hope for a peaceful night for us and for our girl.

By the way, when we got to the hotel she peed on me while we were sitting in a chair. Awesome!

Ethiopia Trip: Day 3: Sunday Morning in Addis

(NOTE: See below for days 1-2, travel. 2 posts in one day-- read that one first!)

December 27, 2009, 9:00am

The day we meet our princess girl! It it about 9am now. A is sleeping-- was awake and fell back to sleep. Outside, Addis is up and moving. Two men change a tire on a blue and white van. My back kills from the bed. The building across the street is still under construction but is nearly finished. A child sings. A few blocks away, I know my daughter is up, in the routine of HH, which will not be her way of life for much longer. The poverty is already heart-breaking. Children, again, begging for money at the van window as we drove from the airport around midnight last night, one not much older than M's daughter T. (We learned later that it is now punishable with a fine to give money to beggars from a car/van, as about 30 to 40 people are killed each month that way in Addis. That explains why the begging was SO much less than it was the first time here.) The beauty is here. Even under a grey sky, the mountains are stunning. The kindness of the people again, evident immediately. D and J.

[See below for the journal entry about the travel. It was right here.]

It is nice this time that the newness and culture shock are not too much. This will indeed be a difference experience in so many ways. I am so happy to be here. The culmination of yet another long wait.

And my E. I cannot wait to meet her in just a few short hours. To walk the path to HH, to go through the gate yet again to meet my daughter...

Ethiopia Trip: Days 1-2: Travel

December 25-26, 2009:

We woke early on Christmas morning to finish up late-minute packing and get R to my friend H's house, where she'd stay 2 nights until my parents returned home from Florida.

R was excited about going to H's house to play with H's 2 daughters.

I was nervous about leaving R for a week and nervous about the 24 1/2 hours travel A and I had ahead of us. On top of that, I'd slept badly (and not very much) and felt horrible. Nerves? Yeah, probably. And I always feel sick before a big trip like this.

Passports? Check. IDs? Check. Money? Check. Return ticket for the baby? Check. Contact solution? (R hid my glasses that morning so I was going to have to just wear contacts the entire trip.) Check.

Ok, we were good to go.

We left the house for the last time as a family of three...

We got to H's house and stayed a little bit. H's parents and grandmother were there to have Christmas morning breakfast, and H's two daughters were excited to see R and to be playing with all their new toys. I tearfully said good bye to my sweet 2-year-old girl, who said, "Bye, Mom!" with a smile and went back to playing with a new train set her friends received from Santa.

The first flight of our trip was uneventful and fine. We checked our 4 bins of donations and carried on everything for us and the baby, as once again I was worried everything wouldn't make it.

We got to Detroit just fine. However, as our flight to Amsterdam got delayed more and more, I started to worry about making our connection to Addis Ababa. The information at the gate was that they had to change planes.

However, the information from the massive CNN screens told us a different story. A flight from Amsterdam to Detroit had had some trouble... A man, CNN was reporting, had tried to light a firecracker on the flight. From watching that and piecing together what the airline was telling us, I gathered that our plane was supposed to be that one on the trip from Detroit to Amsterdam and they had to replace our plane as the FBI was currently examining that one. (Note: We later learned that it was an attempted terrorist attack, not just firecrackers.)

Right before we finally got on the plane, we met R and D, who were in our travel group. They were great to travel with (not just saying that because you read my blog, R! We really did enjoy being on the trip with you, D, and Baby B!).

I wrote in my travel journal the following about the flight:

"The flights and travel [to Addis] were grueling, especially Detroit to Amsterdam. The diaper bag was crammed at my feet, and we were wedged between two strangers. The Amsterdam airport, big, crowded, and overwhelming. Neither of us slept on [the flight from Detroit to Amsterdam] so we were awake over 24 hours. Our KLM flight from Amsterdam to Addis Ababa was much better."

Above: Here we are on the plane, ready to get to Addis Ababa and to meet our girl!

Below: The out the window shots on the flight from Amsterdam to Addis. Baby girl, we flew over the ocean, across the desert, and above mountains to get to you.

I was soooo glad to get to Ethiopia. Truly, it felt like coming home, and in a way, it was. After all, half our little family called Ethiopia home for the first months of their lives.

We got through the visa line, customs, and immigration chatting with R and D. The airport experience was pretty much the same as the last time, except that they do have more than one x-ray machine, so that made the process a lot quicker.

We found our bins with the "help" of the man who in the last time around bullied me into giving him a 20 birr tip for loading 3 bags onto the x-ray. He didn't remember us (obviously!!), but I sure remembered him. He was just as pushy as the last time... the difference this time being he did NOT get that tip from me!

Finally, we got through the doors, and I scanned the crowd waiting to pick people up for J and D, who picked us up the last time. And, suddenly, there was D, smiling and holding a sign that said "[Our agency] Family." I was so happy to see him, and said, "Hi, D, do you remember us?!?" He said he did, and I told him we were back for our second child. It was awesome to see him again, as he was so good to us the last time.

We waited for a little while for the rest of the families in our travel group to get through all the lines and baggage claim. A few were missing some bags and had to fill out paperwork. We got to know the other families a little bit, and they all seemed so nice. (We were lucky to have such a great travel group!)

We all were tired and ready to get to the hotel. It was around 11pm, and we had been traveling for so long.

We exited the airport, and, to my surprise, it really was raining in Ethiopia. So weird, as the first time around it was sunny and mostly cloudless. Below, my (blurry) picture of the airport from the parking lot. I was too tired to care if it came out or not.

We met J with another van in the parking lot, and our luggage was loaded onto the tops of the vans once again. I don't know why, but I was nervous our bags would all go flying off the roof. Of course, they were fine, just like before.

Driving through Addis late at night... How to describe it? It was familiar, for sure, and heart-breaking, too. The poverty, the homeless people on the streets, the blue and white cabs. They were all there, again...

We got to the big overpass near the hotel, and I recognized it as being close. I said to A, "We're almost there..." and soon, we were there. At the Union. Again. Ahh, home, at least in a way.

We waited in line to check in and, unfortunately did not get the same room we had the last time. I was hoping to get it, just because it was the room we'd gotten to know our first daughter in, and it held memories for us. However, we were on the 3rd floor this time, and the room was smaller. I didn't like the room at first and asked to change room. They were all full, but we could have done so the next day. We didn't end up doing that, and the room ended up to be just fine in the end.

Like the last time, we fell into bed and slept, our daughter just a couple of blocks away spending her last night in the place that had been her home for the past 2 1/2 months.

Geez, y'all are fussy!

Shall I start at the...

beginning.....

or the

end.....

of our trip to Ethiopia????

2 Weeks Home

Can ya believe it? She's been home for 2 weeks. In some ways it seems like we were JUST in Ethiopia... On the other hand, it all seems like a very distant memory and that she's always been with us.

My daughters, they are amazing.

I am such a lucky momma!

And, my dear friend S is home with her Sweet B as of this afternoon! What a reason to celebrate!

Mom FAIL!

Ugh. Day two of A back at work, and I've already failed miserably as a (temporary) stay at home mom of two.

I take synthroid daily and have always just kept it by my bed. R knows it is for mom only and doesn't mess with it...

Until today.

R wanted Beary, who happened to be on my bed so I sent her upstairs on her own to get him. E and I stayed downstairs and played baby drums. R shut the door to my room, and I could hear her getting into the shoes on the shoe rack hanging from the door. No big deal, really, I thought, plus it was keeping her occupied for a few minutes.

E started fussing the "I'm hungry and tired" cry so we went into the kitchen to get a bottle. After making it, we went upstairs to my room.

Upon seeing R, she had "the look" in her eyes. You know. The "I'm up to no good" look. I was expecting to find lotion everywhere or something.

Then I noticed the pill bottle on the floor. I ran to it and picked it up.

Empty.

I started panicking. I asking her where mommy's medicine was. "Eat, eat," she said with the sign for it as well. I asked her again, and she gave me the same answer. (Sometimes she makes stuff up so I needed to be certain.)

I called A and couldn't get a hold of him. I was crying. E was crying. R was just standing there. A called me back and got the number for poison control for me.

When I could talk, I called. (I was really hysterical.) I gave the guy the information, and thank you god, the medication wasn't going to kill her. She's fine.

I just held her and sobbed until A got home. E, the sweet little baby, fell asleep while having her bottle next to us on my bed.

Ok, that was definitely more terrifying than her breaking her arm this summer.

And the whole episode from her going upstairs to my finding she'd eaten the pills was 3 or 4 minutes at the most.

So, yeah, a big FAIL to me as a mom of two...

(BTW, A's working on transferring my picture files to an external hard drive, so I'll actually be able to post some pictures of the baby soon!)

Giardia

It actually sounds like sort of a pretty word. A town on the Italian Riviera perhaps. Or a fancy coffee drink.

But no. It's a crappy word (pun intended). And I'm tired of it already. Yes, we're the lucky ones with an Ethiopian child who came home with giardia.

Do you know who I just got off the phone with? The public health department!! Like my baby is going to infect everyone with this horrific disease that will wipe out the population of our city or something! At least that is how the lady on the phone made me feel.

Yesterday, the baby went through 5 outfits!!

And we have to give her nasty, horrible-tasting medicine 3 times a day. Now that is a great way to bond with your new child. Hold her down and force her to take nasty medicine.

It's been one week...

... since we got home!

And what a week it has been.

Here are some changes in my sweet baby since we came home:

1. She is not rejecting me anymore.

2. She is eating like a beast.

3. She never stops moving. (Although still WAY more calm than R.)

4. She can pick up cheerios and puffs and get them in her mouth successfully.

5. She gets angry and throws her head back if she doesn't get her way.

6. She is obsessed with her big sister's hair.

7. She is only waking up once a night.

8. She smiles and giggles.

I fell in love with her yesterday. Does that sound weird? Probably not if you're an adoptive parent. It was strange for me, as with R, I was completely in love with her from the first moment I held her in my arms. R and I connected instantly.

This time, though, was different.

Last night was a beautiful moment. I was feeding her a bottle. She stopped drinking it, looked up right into my eyes, smiled at me, and giggled. She was comfortable in my arms... comfortable and happy. And suddenly, I realized I love her. Wholly, completely, forever.

She is mine and I am hers.

Merry Christmas...

... Ethiopian style! Yes, today was ET Christmas. We didn't do anything for it today due to the bad weather, but we're planning to on Saturday.

Where are the pictures? The day to day posts about our trip to Ethiopia? The updates on the baby and R? They're coming, they're coming.

I promise. There is just a lot going on around here and NO TIME!!

S leaves for ET tomorrow. Safe travels! I cannot wait to see a picture of the whole family!
Lots of love,
M

I'm going to bed.

Good night.

For Sale:

One Two-Year-Old Princess.
Comes complete with cabin fever and a very clear pronunciation of the word "MINE!"

Ok, obviously, I'm just being silly and don't mean that AT ALL, but R is quite the challenge today!

Napping...

...at the same time? Both girls?

Heaven!

We're Home

I'm exhausted.

Of course.

As I am in no shape to find my camera, find the card reader, and download pictures from our trip just yet, I will leave you with the first picture I saw of T when we got our referral. I thought it seemed appropriate.

Good night... Pray we all sleep tight! (Girls are both asleep right now in matching sleepers in their own beds.)

Update from ET!!!

This is M's friend, M, updating for her while they are in ET. As I have been, I'm sure you all have been anxiously awaiting an update!

I got my first update today in the form of a couple of short text messages. A & M do not have internet access at their hotel this time, so details will be limited.

By the time all of us woke up yesterday morning (Sunday), E was in their arms! As I type this, E is sleeping peacefully in M & A's hotel room, as it is around 8 pm (Monday) there. She seems to have taken especially well to A and is looking to be a Daddy's Girl! He was able to get her to sleep tonight after a meltdown.

M reports that she did cry a lot yesterday, as is to be expected. She has a cold that is worsening, so that, of course, compounds the issue.

However, M tells me that they are doing great, and that E is precious, sweet, and cuddly! She has 3 teeth and loves to chew on spoons. She also says that E is much calmer than R. R is quite the bundle of energy, so for M & A's sake, let's hope this phase lasts at least until they have settled in at home and R has gotten used to her new baby sister! They had their embassy appointment today and that went well.

Tomorrow, M & A are going shopping while E plays at HH. Keep them in your prayers that their trip continues to progress smoothly and I will post updates as I receive them!